he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
