Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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