Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
