I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize