u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
