i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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