I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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