My room smells like vodka and shame
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
