I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
