So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
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I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
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We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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