Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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