Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Randomize
