I wannas sexs uuuuu
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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