don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
