as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
