don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
