I think I am morally bankrupt
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
