yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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