so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
