i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
