omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
