I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Randomize
