Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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