I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
We smell like vodka and hangover
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize