Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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