So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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