This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Randomize
