so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
