Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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