also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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