He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
