fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize