i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
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