I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
