I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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