Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize
