We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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