Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
