So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
