No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
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He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
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She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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