how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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