i love accidental penises.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize
