OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm passing your future prison.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i came on her dog
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
