The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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