I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
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