And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
