they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
