Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
