Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
