Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
