Rock
Scissors
Fuck
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Randomize
