I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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